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FINALLY the holidays are here! HOORRRAAAYYYY!! Muahaha. I'm super duper happy. No more waking up at unearthly hours just to go for lectures or tutorial. Believe it or not but I go to school for the sake of going. Just so that I can meet the 75% attendance criteria, pass all modules and get out of SP. I can't wait to graduate, seriously.

But sem 1 is not even over yet. How sad.

SPDJ camp starts today but I didn't even go. Don't feel like going but I'll still drop by tomorrow cos I've promised to jam with Alvin and also cos I've told Ragu that I'll meet him during camp. He sms me and said that I ditched him. Hur hur. So I hafta at least show my face and chit chat with him awhile. Leon didn't turn up for the camp also. So I won't be accused of ditching him too. Hee.

Cousin's wedding tomorrow. Paternal side. Kinda lazy but I'll go to meet my cousins and also to give my nenek and ayah some face la huh. If I don't appear, I wonder what the makciks will say about me. Haha. Plus I'm free tomorrow, aside from the fact that I'm going to school for awhile. Don't know what to wear. Probably have to wear baju kurung and stuff like that. Ugh! Don't like. Think I shall wear tshirt and jeans and put the baju kurung in my bag to change into when I reach my aunty's place. No way am I walking around Singapore in a baju kurung! Super unglam. It's not even hari raya la. Bleah.

Enough of that. My throat is still itching so I shall scratch it now. Bye.

Yo!

My mum brought me to the optometrist today to get me a pair of new specs. And I'll be getting my new specs latest by Wednesday :)) The main reason I got my mum to bring me to the optometrist is so that she'd pay for the specs that I'm getting. Hee.

I'm still not well yet. Coughing like mad and my nose is blocked. Temperature is down but the headache stays. Feels like shit laa. And I can't take my medicine yet cos it'll make me drowsy. Feel so fucking shitty now.

Gonna meet up for BD tomorrow. Presentation on Monday. Hope everything goes smoothly. Can't wait for Monday to be over. In fact, I can't wait for next week to be over. Cos then it'll be the holidays!! Although the 3 weeks are meant for studying, at least it won't be as pressurizing as going to school. And honestly, I've got lotsa school stuffs to catch up on. Sian.

Poor Zaid lost his N95 thus losing all his contact which resulted in him asking me "Who are you?" when I sms-ed him last night. And guess what? His hamster is still alive. AMAZING! Haha.

I'm so bored now although I've got lotsa stuffs to do. I'm like going around disturbing people on MSN. Geez.

And tonight is such a warm night.

I wanna be the one to draw you pictures and play with your hair.

Omg. After don't know how many years, I finally chatted with Darul! Hee. It's probably at least 4 years since I last spoke to him la. Gawdzzzzz. And his gf happens to be a senior from Crescent. Err...Okay..

I haven't been feeling well for the past few days. Had high fever yesterday and it came together with sore throat and cough and ulcers in my mouth. It's like a package, you know. Just that this package does not do me any good. My throat hurts terribly. It was so bad that it bled yesterday. How disgusting was that? I just hope that it'll be alright by Monday so that it won't affect our BD presentation.

Don't think I'll be going for prep camp tomorrow. Don't feel well enough. Sorry. And I don't think I'm going to turn up for camp either. Cos on Saturday will be my cousin's wedding so no point I go for camp opening and closing only.

Being sick is good cos I don't eat much, I vomited and lost some weight! Hooray! It's like a blessing in disguise. Lol.

Anyway, this week has been a horrible week despite Monday being a public holiday. I went to school 2 hours early on Tuesday, thinking that lecture starts at 8am instead of 10am! For the first time ever, I made an extra effort to come to school on time only to realise that I actually got the time wrong. How unlucky. Yea yea, laugh your head off Jasmine. At least I've proven to you that this kind of thing not only happens to you and that it happens to me too. Lol. We have the same fate eh.

And I'm super lethargic now. Slept practically the whole day after I came back from school and yet I'm still so tired. Sian. Wanna sleep again. Bye.

After a long time, I'm still thinking of you.

Muahaha! I saw Ronald Yeo today! Wheee~~

And I made a new friend. Coincidentally, his name is Ronald! And he's Ronald Yeo's friend too. That's how I got to know him. Haha. If I remembered correctly, his surname is Min.

Jane kept staring at MY Ronald today. Wth. Hands off Jane! Don't even think of seducing him! And Fangqing thought that I was once with Yingliang just because I commented that my name was Shafinaz Yeo before changing it to Shafinaz Tay. Haha. Scammed her into believing that Yingliang don't want me anymore that's why now my name is just Shafinaz. Haha. She's so cute la. When people tell her the truth, she refused to believe. But when people lie to her, she believe it straight away even if it's some ridiculous lie. Haha. Damn funny.

Whatever it is, I was so goddamn happy to see Ronald today. And the other Ronald (my new friend) was like trying to persuade me to join Scuba Diving Club. I want to!! But year 3 already la. Cannot fool around like before. Heh.

As usual, Monday sucks. BD was boring and torturous. Nothing that we did seems alright. And the lecturer refused to tell us what's there to be improvised. Damn. And CF has yet to be completed. Halfway there though. BD report is also halfway there. A little bit of touch up here and there before I can send to Pam for editing. And I have yet to start on gems report. It's 20%, mind you. Sigh. School's getting tougher. And I hafta start studying already. The mid-sem test is after the holidays and I so don't wanna screw it up this time. Go go go, Shafinaz! Okay, lame! Lu's lecture wasn't that boring today. It started with Hilmi whipping out his new but uncool N81 and ended with me, him and Peok camwhoring at the back of the lecture hall shamelessly. Even Spider and Winston played a part in camwhoring although they weren't that hardcore. Haha.
Going back to Maybank after school on Wednesday to collect my testimonial. Whee! Can see the people there again :D :D :D

Shall ask Junhong if he wants to follow me. But I doubt so cos he's super lazy. Heh. Anyway, I gotta go complete my unfinished work. Shall update again soon.

Happy Mothers' Day!

Yeah, whatever.

Meeting up with those NCC peeps on Friday was great. I spent $10 just to see Jasmine the BOMB! Sex, you honoured anot? I'm honoured that you also paid $10 just to see me! :D

Have yet to do BLAW tutorial for tomorrow. Sian, don't feel like going to school but no choice, have got lots of stuffs to settle.

CF: not completed.
BD: halfway there, NOT. maybe?
tutorials: pending
SPDJ stuffs: don't know, don't care, have better things to do.

This is random but Ronaldo nearly had sex with a tranny. Haha. I think it's damn funny cos the tranny looks like him! Lol.

And I'm deeply in love with Ethan! Omg, he's super hot but nobody seems to agree with me. Sad. I don't care what you people say but he's hot hot HOT! Ethan, I love you! Lol. I'm delusional, so what? >.<

Can't wait for the 3 weeks holiday to come. Although I don't think that I'll be able to enjoy fully, at least I don't have to wake up at unearthly hours just to go to school. And I'm having second thoughts about helping out for the coming SPDJ camp.

Fazly came to look for me at home on Wednesday but by the time I reached home at 11plus, he already left. Haha. Then on Friday, he came to my place again. Unannounced. Maybe he thought that it'd be a surprise but guess what? I didn't go home that night so once again, I didn't see him! Omg. My brother was like saying to him "If you want to meet her, why don't you just sms her?". Lol. Don't know what crap answer he gave my brother la. Nvm, can always meet some other time. Not sure when he'll have to book in. So that means I'll have to see him soon, right? Haha.

I'm running low on cash and my Hot Sex knows why. Stupid taxi, stupid wallet. That's all I'm gonna say.

Yo! It's been a week since I last logged into LJ. Lotsa things happen but I shan't elaborate. Let's just say that I am so over you! Yay! I'm free from all the mental torture now. I've just realized what a sucker you are and I'm so glad that I smacked you hard the other day :D
Having a tough time doing CRAA tutorial now. Damn. I don't even know what I'm doing la.

Anyway, I kept bumping into Yuani in school. Omg! She's so skinny and HOT la. *drools.

Friday is coming!! Whee!! Surprisingly, I'm going for Crez Awards! Damn. It's lame, I know. But I'm going just so that I can meet up with Samantha, Yishiuan, Yizhen, Rachel, Huey and Jasmine my SEX! Ooohlalaa.

I've really run out of things to say here. Or maybe it's cos I'm not in the mood. So...whatever. Bye

Hello.

I'm so tired today. Don't know why though. Anyway, Pansy Tan is happy with me cos I've been attending all my tutorials and lectures. Muahaha.

And I am so gonna go down for CCA drive again tomorrow. Not that I'm very enthu or what. Just that I wanna see RONALD YEO!!! Ahhhhh!! Hahaha. Long time didn't see my Mr Yeo siol. WHEE~~

Oh oh oh. Kelvin got a lip piercing!! Damn cool la. I also want. But scared pain. So nevermind, just stick to one tongue piercing for now :D

Three lectures and one tutorial tomorrow. Sian. But nevermind, I'll still go cos I'm a good student. Haha. Yeah right.

I'm starting to crap so I better stop now. Ciao!

And I like you still :)

Yo!

Today is very fun. Cos I slept 3 times before doing my tutorials. And I realized that this week's tutorials are not so bad cos there's not many to be done. Either that or it's kind of simple. So I'm happy :)

Okay. I've just typed out dumb and redundant stuff so ignore the paragraph above please.

Monday to Wednesday shall be the CCA drive day. Sian. But nevertheless, I shall bring my laptop in case I feel like jamming cos sitting at the booth will surely be boring. And I wouldn't go for the CCA drive had I not volunteer myself last week. There's no backing out now. Heh.

Thursday is labour day! Means no school! Yay!

I've been yearning to see you. But since you're adamant in not seeing me face to face, then there's nothing I can do. In a way, this is good cos you're helping me not to like you anymore. Thank you.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Was kinda pissed yesterday. I was told that I'd be able to help out for the lollipop event. So I stupidly went down to MOS only to be told that the number of people that could help out is restricted and that I'm supposed to just hang around but cannot go into the DJ console. Few minutes later, I was told that I can't hang around either cos the event starts at 7pm and I can only come then. So somebody was suggesting " why not you go somewhere first then come back later?". Obviously I said Ok since I've already been booted out and can't possibly be so shameless to hang around there what. So me and Leon went off and never came back. Think he went to meet his gf while I went home to eat then went out again to Fazzy's place. Yeah, must go home to eat cos I'm already so broke.

Fucking waste my time la.

Reached home at 11plus last night. Although too tired to do anything, I couldn't sleep cos got BD (aka FYP) research to do. So yea, I spent the night doing BD research. How boring.

And Zaid has bought a new hamster but he wouldn't allow me to see it cos he's afraid that I might be a hamster-killer. What the fuck? Hahaha. Ridiculous la.

I'm feeling a little bit stress now cos this is the first time that I'm being so hardworking since I entered poly. Hee. I'm terrible, I know.

Omg. I've seen Griggly, Jasmine the Hot Sex's 'son'. Hahaha. So cute and green and squiggly. Lol. Hot Sex, let's meet up next week. I'll pester you till you can come meet me. Cos I'm meeting Dii next week too! :D :D

Yo homies!

Was damn lethargic the whole day today. Maybe it's because I didn't have enough sleep last night. Plus I had a slight fever this morning. Sian.

Went for gems for the first time today. It's so freaking boring! I was like sleeping throughout half the lesson while Junhong read a magazine. That's how boring the lesson was.

The platoon is gonna meet up for dinner tomorrow. Don't know whether I should go or not cos I'm also kind of financially tight at the moment. Plus Jasmine The Sex might not be going so I don't see the point in going either. Heh.

And I'm not gonna go for the Lollipop party at MOS this Friday either. Not in the mood to do much stuffs nowadays. And shit, I suddenly remembered that I have not completed my CRAA tutorial yet. Damn. Why must the lesson start at 8am tomorrow? Super early la. Fuck.

I don't want to go to school anymore :( I am so looking forward to graduation. Hah. MST haven't even start yet and I'm already dreaming of graduation. Bleah.

I miss you. I'm always thinking of you. I want to see you.

Anyway, The Ex-BF texted me today. Had a mixed feeling about it but whatever la. It's already something that belongs to the past so I shan't comment about it.

Some loser has been trying to make use of me. Just because I treat you nicely does not mean that I'm stupid, you fucker.

Hello.

I just got my hair cut yo! Cool shiattt! And the hairdresser is cute :D

Today is a super boring day. And quite a number of people was in a bad mood. Or at least they weren't in a jovial mood. So it makes my day even more boring. Damn it.

My mum was like nagging cos i just reach home. What the hell. At night still got the mood to scold. Can't she wait till tomorrow? Sian.

Can't sleep now. And somebody is obviously avoiding me although he tries very hard to pretend that everything is normal. Damn it. Can you not avoid me? Haha. Cos I like you, damn it. Okay, I just uttered crap so...whatever.

Fuck it. Can you just please stop avoiding me? Ugh!

Hello hello!

I'm trying to catch up with my LTC Redang mates online but only Diana and Chin Chye replied me. Haha. Sad. I guess the rest are busy.

I don't know what to say in this entry so I shall talk about my friend, Icky.

I contacted Icky today. After don't know how many months, we finally caught up. I can't even remember when was the last time we chatted laa. Icky is a special friend. I got to know him when I was in Sec 2. We always took the same train from Boon Lay to Redhill when I was in Crescent and he in SJI. Somehow, (I don't know how), I got his number and we began to talk on the phone almost every night. The funny thing was that we didn't talk to each other when met face to face. Maybe cos we're both..err..shy? Lol.

There was once in Sec 3 when we took the same train and even sat side by side. But we didn't even utter a word to each other. Instead, we just smiled and kept quiet. Then on that very same night, we texted each other and chit chatted on the phone like usual. Weird kind of friendship right?

When I was in Sec 4, he went to poly. In fact, he went to Singapore Poly. We texted each other as usual but it wasn't active as before cos he was busy with projects and I, with my O'lvls. So when I came to SP, I was damn noob. And I still remembered Icky bringing me around school. There was once in Year 1, Sem 1 where I got lost in school and it was raining. I didn't know how to walked the sheltered path so I called him. And he was damn sweet la. Cos he actually walked from foodcourt 1 to foodcourt 5, meet me and sent me to School of Business. Haha. I was damn touched cos I was really lost then. Lol. That was when I was a dumb freshie la. And that was the first time we spoke to each other face to face. Heh.

Now, he has already graduated and I don't know when I'll see him again. But yea, he's a special friend of mine cos when I need someone to vent my anger on, I'll call him and he'll just listen. When I need to complain or scold someone, he'll just lend a listening ear. He'll also crack me up with some feeble joke whenever I'm down. Aye. He's just super nice that sometimes, I feel bad for not having done anything for him.

Okay. End of story. Bye.

Haha. Guess what? I tried to hate you but I simply can't. Cos you're too adorable for me to hate :(

Crap. What am I talking about?

Anw, I've decided to wait. Maybe not exactly wait for you but I'll still wait. As of now, I admit that I simply can't chuck my feelings for you aside.
Maybe I'll just let this feeling fade away. Or maybe I'll just retain them for memory sake and hope for you to have a change of heart.

I don't know. But I'll just wait.

It sucks to know that you like another. It sucks to know that you're totally oblivious. And it sucks even more that of all the people in this world, I happen to like you.

You suck. And I don't want to like you anymore.

Okay. I'm in a better mood now after talking to somebody. Haven't talked to him for a long, long time but well, he still cheers me up! Furthermore, he already graduated so I won't be seeing him around in school. How sad cos I like to see him. Lol.

Anw, did I mention that I'm gonna find Mr Kwok tomorrow? Omg. Can't wait to go find him at SAA. Haha. I shall pretend to have a lot of questions to ask him so that I can talk to him longer. Lol. Then will have to also find Uncle David to fix the noticeboard in club. Ok la. Uncle David not bad. Just a bit naggy. Lol.

Haven't seen Da Bitch (read: Zaid) for a really long time. Haha. I bet he's fatter now. Fat and chubby like a puffer fish.

Talking about puffer fish, I think I should go take a puff now, if you know what I mean. Haha. Bye bye bitches! :D

I know I should just give up on you. Furthermore, wasn't that meant for me? You know what I'm talking about.

Hello.

I feel like crap now :/

Anyway, I come across this phrase, "The best things in life aren't things". That is so true.
I miss ITP. Mainly the colleagues but I don't miss the work itself. Heh. It feels good to be back in school although I can already feel the pressure.  I see dumb freshies everywhere. They look as lost as always.

Met Jasmine in school today. Cos she was at New Town and decided to drop by SP and guess what? She got lost at T17! Haha. Jasmine darling, you are so cute. Lol. Went for my FA tutorial while she waited for me in the library and we bitch after that. Ok, not really bitch. We just commented on everybody  who walked passed us. So fun.

I know I shouldn't say this but I'm considering quitting SPDJ. I have my reasons but as of now, we'll see how it goes.

Can't write anymore. Mind block.

Hey hey hey!

ITP is finally over. Yay! But somehow, I don't feel as happy as I thought I'd be. Not having to wake up so goddamn early, do waivers and answering customers' calls are certainly something that I should be happy about. But Maybank has got a nice working environment. The colleagues are all so nice and friendly. And I don't feel like going back to school yet. I'm dying to meet all my friends but I don't think I'm ready for final year. Not that I have a choice though.

I've been such a demon who's devoid of feelings lately. I think I am so fucking mean. Just today itself, I argued with my mother umpteen times. And I've been avoiding many people cos I just feel like doing that. Also, my grandma is ill and not once have I visited her. The last time I saw her was during Hari Raya Haji, which was decades ago. And lastly, I've been hating innocent people secretly.

Doesn't all that explains how unfeeling I am? Especially the part about my grandma. Don't ask me why am I like that cos I don't know why either.

I'm fat. I AM SO FUCKING FAT NOW! How sad. People, please don't be surprised to see a fat girl in school who claims that her name is Nurshafinaz because believe it or not, that fat girl is really me. I've turned into a chomping monster who craves for chicken bao everyday. Damn it.

Alright, I think I've typed enough for now. I'm super bored and I think I should buff my nails. Bye.